Ok, so ages ago, I threatened to get all Excel about the scores. Well that day has arrived (although I actually got all Open Office about it as I’m a cheapskate) and the fruits of my labours are proudly displayed below.
The scoring system works as thus. If you come first on any given show (or joint first), you get six points. If you come second (or joint second) you get five points, four points for third place and so on. After that, your total points are averaged through your number of appearences and the contenders are ranked in order. Once this has happened the contenders are then ranked by their average score (that is toal score divided by total appearances) and the whole thing looks like it starts to make sense. I realise that this is all a little messy and probably not that fair but then again, I’ve never really had to create a scoring system out of thin air before so improvisation is the name of the game.
At present, we can see that Elfyn LLoyd is sitting pretty on top, but not without some fierce competion from the likes of Conti, Williams, Murray, Middlesbrough and Belfast while down at the other end Jim Allister is on the naughty step, followed by Fox, Street-Porter, May and of course, Vorderman. This series is technically moot as I missed bunch of shows near the start, but it should serve as a good dry run and the winner may recieve some completely arbitrary award of absolutely no monetary value when we reach recess. So there you go, that’s how it all works. Let me know if you detect any glaring errors and check back for regular updates. See you next week for Stevenage. Hertfordshire, innit?
| Appearances | Average Score | 1st | 2nd | 3rd | 4th | 5th | 6th | Average Points | |
| Elfyn Llwyd | 1 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Shirley Williams | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Tom Conti | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Middlesbrough Audience | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Belfast Audience | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Douglas Murray | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Justine Greening | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Monty Don | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Dewsbury Audience | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Claire Short | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| David Starkey | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Caroline Lucas | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 |
| Alex Salmond | 1 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | |
| Cardiff Audience | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Canary Wharf Audience | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Rory Stewart | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Shaun Woodward | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Gerry Kelly | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Margaret Ritchie | 1 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Jo Swinson | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| George Galloway | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Lord Lawson | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Wythenshaw Audience | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Sayeeda Warsi | 1 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 |
| Jane Moore | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 |
| Basildon Audience | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 |
| Nigel Farage | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Lord Adonis | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Boris Johnson | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Roy Hattersley | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Caroline Fint | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Lord Falconer | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Melanie Phillips | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Jenny Tonge | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Charles Kennedy | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Margaret Beckett | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Glasgow Audience | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Baron Trimble | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
| Peter Haine | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Will Self | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Ruth Lea | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Coventry Audience | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Ben Bradswaw | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Andrew Lansley | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Martin Sorrell | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Julia Goldsworthy | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Liam Byrne | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Sammy Wilson | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 |
| Kelvin MacKenzie | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 |
| Lynne Featherstone | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Carol Vorderman | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Liam Fox | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Janet Street-Porter | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Theresa May | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
| Jim Allister | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 |
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